This is an eight minute video of Krista Horning, sharing her testimony about how she lives with disability and her faith. But this post is not about her entirely rather it is more about me .
If you can take out the precious eight minutes out of your busy life, you will see the power of faith. Here is this lady, disable in many ways. Disability that has probably scarred her and ruined her life and yet her testimony rocked me to my core. I did not hear a complain, I did not here a doubt, I did not hear how she consoles herself, all I heard was faith, rock solid faith. The kind of faith God looks for inside us but seldom finds. After I watched her video, I asked myself about what would have I said if I had been through what she has been though and I will be honest here, I did not find much faith. I found doubts and complains, anger and hurt. And it ashamed me. Not because what will people say about me, but that how simple and easy we take the matter of faith at times. We treat it as the most casual thing in the world. The most stupid thing in the universe. And I can not begin to say how much strange I find the people who insist on “God is evil” mantra; would they stop for a minute and ponder upon the paradox? The person who goes through the pain, is not cursing God, and those who probably did not went through the same, feel the hatred. Intellectually it sounds fair but on a more basic logic, I find it astounding.
I am sure Krista went through a lot of pain, suffering and humiliation and yet she came out clean with her faith shining around her, she is truly a shining light of faith and I respect that enormously. Perhaps faith like this was what Christ wanted when he told us, “You are the light of the world.”
It also reminded of the immortal words of Christ and the centurion:
5 When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help. 6 “Lord,” he said, “my servant lies at home paralyzed, suffering terribly.”
7 Jesus said to him, “Shall I come and heal him?”
8 The centurion replied, “Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9 For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, ‘Go,’ and he goes; and that one, ‘Come,’ and he comes. I say to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.”
10 When Jesus heard this, he was amazed and said to those following him, “Truly I tell you, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith. 11 I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven.12 But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”
13 Then Jesus said to the centurion, “Go! Let it be done just as you believed it would.” And his servant was healed at that moment.
The faith that Jesus praised it. What was special? I think it was the simplest thing of all. It was absolute trust in God even when all that we hold dear was on the line and probably lost. Krista’s words challenged me. It reminded me a lesson we sometimes forget, that no matter what the circumstances, there is no substitute for faith.
People yell at God, people curse God for letting bad things happens. Here is this lady who acknowledges her pain but she is not yelling, she is not whining. There is something so beautiful about such faith that it is hard to pen down.
The description of the faithful in the epistle of Hebrews is filled with challenge, trouble and problems.
who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, 34 quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. 35 Women received back their dead, raised to life again. There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection.36 Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. 37 They were put to death by stoning;[e] they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— 38 the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.
I believe God looks in the church (not the building), the body of believers for faith, that is higher than mountains. I wonder if he would look at me and say the same thing he said to that crowd. “This is the faith I am looking for.” I am not sure about that. Faith is a battle, it is a match, a race, the well that you have to dig up everyday to drink some water. Faith shines in hardships always because it is the the hardest to keep when all is being lost.
Faith is a treasure my dear friends, hold on to it. Challenge it and grow in it. Have we been on the couch for too long? where is our faith? Where does it rest and how deep it goes in the soils of our heart? This is a question worth asking yourself.
I asked my self this and the only thing that came to my mind was “…you have been weighed on the scales and found wanting;” and then I cried.